When it comes to sex, pleasure is the most important factor, and what’s pleasurable is entirely subjective. While some prefer long and sensual encounters, others might desire something quick and intense. The goal is always satisfying sex, not just finishing quickly.
A 2005 survey of sex therapists revealed that vaginal sex typically lasts between three and seven minutes. The survey identified one to two minutes as “too short” and 10 to 30 minutes as “too long.” Ideally, sex therapists considered seven to thirteen minutes to be a “desirable” duration for vaginal sex.
It’s important to remember that most research on this topic defines sexual duration based on intravaginal ejaculatory latency time (IELT), which measures the time it takes for a person with a penis to ejaculate during vaginal penetration. However, this definition doesn’t encompass everyone’s understanding of sex. Many people consider sex to be complete when all partners have climaxed, which can be achieved through various activities like touching, oral sex, vaginal sex, or anal sex, or a combination. Moreover, relying on IELT as a baseline assumes penile-vaginal intercourse is the only standard, overlooking the fact that vaginal sex doesn’t always involve a partner with a penis, and anal sex is distinct from vaginal sex. More research is needed to determine the average and desired durations for these other types of sexual encounters.
